We Are Family

This month, in honor of Valentine's Day, I'd like to focus most of my blog topics on showing your love.  Which is funny because we aren't really even big Valentine's Day celebrators.  But since most of the world recognizes this as the month of love, I'm gonna go with it.


I decided to start the month talking about something I love more than almost anything....Team Holmes. There is nothing more important to me than my family.  They are my greatest treasure and my most important job. That doesn't mean that I don't want to strangle them all some days.  But for the most part, they are pretty darn awesome.

As a bi-racial family, we have often had the attitude of 'it's us against the world'.  Maybe that's how the whole Team Holmes thing started.  I'm not really sure.  I have to say this attitude has served us well though. When the chips are down, it doesn't matter what anyone else does or thinks, because you have each other.  Ya'll are a unit.  We are a team.

Or maybe you're not such a unit.  But you'd like to be.  Maybe you'd like to spend more time together this year or for your family to grow closer.  Are you spending time together?  I mean, really together, not just 'we're all under the same roof'.  Do you even know how to spend time together?

Years ago we started family night.  Once upon a time, my husband loved playing poker.  He played all the time.  And I loved scrapbooking and went out to do that often.  I found on Fridays that I was always extra sad if he or I were gone.  It was the end of the week and all I wanted to do was be together.  Thus Friday night/Family night was born.  Now, no one makes plans on a Friday unless it is something really special (like someone's birthday party).  Other than that, you want me on a Friday?  You're going to have to come to the HolmeStead.  I'm not even kidding.  (By the way, others are allowed to join our family night!)

Originally, we would do different things each week.  Bowling, the movies, go to a favorite restaurant...Then, times got tight and family night turned into stay home, make pizza and watch a movie. And you know what?  I loved it even more.  For one thing, I'll be honest, I am wiped out on Fridays! And then I realized it didn't matter how exciting our evening was. All that mattered was that we were together.

Now times are not tight for us.  But guess what, we still don't go out on Fridays anymore (well, once in awhile).  We make pizza, play a game, and then watch a movie with some popcorn.  And while I realize that most people don't want to make pizza from scratch like I do (don't judge me!), you can still buy a crust and "make your own".  It's more fun than ordering out.  Just sayin'.  And family night is about having fun.  Enjoy each other's company.  Laugh.  Tell stories.  Talk about your day.

Family nights are sacred and non-negotiable.  They have become a part of who we are.  I remember when my 12 year old was in 1st grade her teacher told me that Cassidy often journaled about family night.  The teacher loved the idea and said to me. "I would love to know if you guys still do that when she is in high school." For some reason, I would think of that every so often.  I would wonder if they would ditch us and then I started thinking, maybe they would bring friends over here for family night, that would be fun.  I know when boys and dating and football games come around, I might not stand a chance.  Then again, I just might.  Last year, Cassidy went to a middle school dance on a Friday night. She was dying to go and asked if we could move family night to Saturday. She was all excited. An hour later she called and asked if she could come home.  When I picked her up, I said, "What's wrong, was it lame?" and she said, "No, it was pretty good.  I just wanted to be with you guys."  Boom.  Drop the mic.

I realize that you might not feel like you can just announce that you are going to have a weekly family night.  Like most things, it's all about the baby steps.  Try for one a month or every couple weeks.  Make them fun! Play the xbox, do karaoke, have a dance party (our personal fav!), make a fun snack to have for the movie, play pictionary....the possibilities are endless!  And if you've had a tough week, pop a movie in, order a pizza (yes, I just said that) and snuggle on the couch.  After all, that's what your team is there for.

Love Your Family!
K